i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
