is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Randomize
