I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Randomize
