is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
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