Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
