I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
i believe in u and ur pee
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
