u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
too bad you live with your parents still
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Mom said you looked used
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Randomize
