I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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