He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
