just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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