Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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