Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize
