It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
