can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
