Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
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