There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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