I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
how drunk are you?
Several
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
