I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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