i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
