i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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