i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I seem to have left my pride at pride
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Randomize
