Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
