I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
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Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
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My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
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