I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
