my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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