I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize
