But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
