Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Randomize
