I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Boobs speak an international language.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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