Tell her she can't have a vagina
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
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