she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
And then my night got REAL pukey
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
