whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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