Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Randomize