And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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