very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
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My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
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I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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