id be glad to
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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