I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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