I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
