Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
