Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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