Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
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