Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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