i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Randomize
