dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
