Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize