this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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