Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
