This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
