I'm really into asian looking animals
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
