I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize